The two Jeffs

If you have read this blog for long you know that I lost a lot of weight, but have struggled to keep it off. After losing over 100 pounds, I started sabotaging my efforts and packed some of the weight back on. My cardiologist suggested that I get counseling to figure out why.

So I did. And it's been a series of "aha" moments that seem so obvious in hindsight. Here's the latest:

Since I sabotage my own efforts I must have internal conflict about the goal. I visualize that internal conflict as between "Skinny Jeff" and "Baby Jeff". Skinny Jeff keeps making plans and goals and lists that work for two or three days before Baby Jeff rebels.

So my task is to make peace between these two.

I have no internal conflict about exercising or racing. Skinny and Baby love these. It's the "take aways" that Baby Jeff doesn't like. My counselor says that I have so little "Jeff time" that this isn't surprising at all.

I made deal with myself that I would place some modest limits on eating high calorie foods, in exchange for some "Jeff time". It's a start.